Is mindfulness more about accepting life as it is—or about becoming aware of habits so they can be changed?
This question sits at the heart of mindful practice—and it’s a tension I grapple with both personally and in my work with clients.
The Case for Acceptance
Some teachers and practitioners say mindfulness is, at its core, the art of being present with “what is.” It’s the antidote to the endless striving and “fixing” mindset so common in our culture. As Jon Kabat-Zinn famously put it:
“Mindfulness is awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, non-judgmentally.”
For this view, mindfulness is a radical act of acceptance—a way of meeting experience without an agenda, even when it’s uncomfortable.
The Case for Change
Others see mindfulness as the key to unlocking transformation. By shining the light of awareness on our habits and unconscious patterns, we create the opportunity for real change.
Mindfulness-based practices have helped people quit smoking, manage chronic disease, lower stress, and reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression.
A 2020 article in the Harvard Review of Psychology found a “growing body of evidence” that mindfulness practices are effective in reducing harmful health behaviors, catalyzing positive changes, and improving both physical and mental health outcomes.
Mindfulness in Practice: Holding the Tension
But if you cross the line from presence to striving for results, is it still mindfulness?
This is the paradox at the heart of the practice, and it’s especially relevant for those of us in the coaching community. As coaches, we’re trained to “forward the action” and help people create meaningful change. Yet as mindfulness practitioners, we’re wary of turning self-development into just another task—another thing to do or check off the list.
Acceptance and Action: Both Are Needed
My experience is that true mindfulness is about both. It’s about engaging the world skillfully—acting with wisdom and compassion—from a foundation of spacious, non-judgmental awareness. Sometimes, the next step is deep acceptance. Other times, it’s the insight and courage to move toward change.
The art is learning to sense what each moment calls for. Sometimes action is actually the deepest expression of self-acceptance. Sometimes, acceptance is itself a radical act of transformation.
Reflection
How do you navigate the tension between acceptance and change in your own life?
What helps you discern whether the moment calls for mindful presence, wise action, or both?
I’d love to hear your insights—share your reflections in the comments.